Yep, that is totally my fucking ass, with a size 15 boot print imposed ever so lovely on it. #SirBradsWork (Thank you Sir Brad) Twitter: @AlphaLthrBear.
Back in a land far far away, when I was young once, and full of hope……. (Shameless Bird cage reference, if you have not seen this movie, give me your gay card….NOW!) I was collared to Sir Brad. And he had this crazy ass fucking paddle made out of a size 15 Vibram Boot Sole. The fucking thing was narley and OF COURSE, I was the first to ride its lighting.
Many a boy has desired to try this paddle out, but few have been “able” to. Not to toot my own horn here, but this thing is rather advanced. It’s not for the faint of heart, and being struck with it made me both instantly hard, and light-headed all at the same time.
Being able to play at this level, or any fucking level starts with trust. Now that is something that is developed over time, Sir Brad is a capable DOM with a good amount of experience. Not everyone you play with is going to be the Don Jaun of throwing hands. So how do you build trust so everyone involved gets hard?
DON’T BE A MUTE, FUCKING COMMUNICATE!
When I say it’s important to communicate, I am not fucking kidding. It is the foundation of EVERYTHING! And you need to make sure that channels of communication are understood before you start. And I am not going to put the task of creating good lines of communication on the DOMs, NOOOOO. Subs you need to make sure that you advocate for yourself first.
I have a recurring theme with regards to any boy/pup/sub I have in my orbit. Always remember your number and that’s #1.
A wise AlphaBoy once told me that while the Masters/Sirs/Alphas/Doms may be the head, we are the neck that turns the head, and we are truly the difference between a successful session, and complete and total disaster.
But BOY how do I communicate?
I’m glad you asked that……
Now what I am about to say is merely from personal experience from my time on both ends of the paddle, (taking and giving). Nearly everyone I have played with falls into two categories, verbal and non-verbal subs.
May subs, myself included, I become completely non-verbal when in play the role of the submissive. This happens for two reasons:
- I drop into a very deeply subbie headspace, and revert to a subjectively primal position. It’s totally natural and one of the most common reasons why subs go non-verbal in a session.
- When I’m a submissive rule I do just that submit. I want to empower my Dom with all of my will and allow them to take complete and utter fucking control.
It’s only get worse with trust. The greater the level of trust the more submissive I get the the more non-verbal I get. It’s a crazy fucking cycle which culminates in me grunting and groaning my way into an endorphin fueled frenzy. Simply glorious!
But it all comes back to developing that trust partnership.
Experienced Doms can read body queues watching how you move with the strikes. See how you present yourself when you are ready for more, or need a brake and some tender-care (in session care which is the poplar opposite of the impact sensation).
Even still when two consenting players have this non-verbal channel of communications it is still Uber fucking important for there to be some level of spoke signals.
Falling back again on my personal experiences from the bottom, during the initial lead up to a session, we discuss how to do check-ins
So what’s a check-in?
Simply put it’s a moment during a session when both partner’s communicate with each other using verbal or visual queues.
Here’s a perfect example. As you may or may not know I am collared to my partner and Master, Daddy. (See you thought I was gonna give you his name…..nope!)
Daddy likes to take away all of my senses and abilities to communicate. He does this with gags, hoods, mitts and some good old fashion bondage. This of course only services to force deeper into that submissive headspace and makes me even more compliant.
In theory we do not need any communications at this point in our relationship. We have spent a lot of time building up to a point we’re I….yes you heard me right….I IMPOSE few if any limits on him.
Even still he demands that we still do “check-ins” during our sessions together.
For us a check-in can be as simple as a “you good boy?” To which my response may just be an affirming grunt made around my gag.
Another option for check-ins in to do a simple thumbs up, which is totally possible even when you maybe….restricted.
Check-ins can be anything you and your play partner decide they should be, but they are a perfect why to start building that initial trust.
Let’s talk about our Verbal Subs sometime know as “Bossy Bottoms”
Yep you heard me, I’m talking about all of the proclaimed bossy bottoms, but there is nothing fucking bossy about them. Sub which can work with verbal queues are intact very in tune with their submissive mindset. Generally speaking they are able to switch seamlessly between a normal state of consciousness, communicate then slip directly back into the headspace. It’s really honestly a talent.
Also a statement from my own personal experience, non-verbal submissive may not have worked up the to the level of trust to completely give in, and that’s okay. As I need say, it’s all about fucking trust.
Lets talk about Play
Okay, we can talk about the mechanics of impact play, and to discuss the mechanics we need to talk about the implements.
Generally implements or toys can be broken down into two type, Thuddy and Sting.
Let’s start with my personally favorite. Thuddy toys. These are going to be flat toys like Paddles and floggers. Generally Thuddy toys have a greater “volume” of impact. Meaning, the strike contains more kinetic energy. These toys are generally made of leather.
Next are Daddy’s favorite, the Stingy toys. These fuckers hurt, and to some extent are meant too. Compared to Thuddy toys, these will produce the highest level of endorphins in the shortest amount of time. Toys like Crops, Canes and Single Tail Whips provide singular direct strikes compared to Thuddy toys which generally distributes the energy over a larger surface area.
Both can leave extensive marks and bruising.
I personally love showing off my marks, and where them like a badge of fucking honor.
Don’t forget about Aftercare.
I’ll speak up so y’all can fucking hear me in the back……
DO NOT FORGET ABOUT AFTERCARE!
After any play session it’s vitally important that you all take time to come down off the conjoint high you have both experienced. In fact for many the after care is even more intense than the impact play itself. The level of intimacy is generally off the charts and is like the cherry on top of the impact play Sunday.
Every time I play I learn something new about myself, and I am sure that all end up writing more in this subject. If you want me to sum this all up, impact play is an easy thing to try, but it’s always important to go slow. Take your time, make sure you communicate clearly with your partner, check-in and make sure you take the time and provider proper after care.
Again, these ramblings are based on my own experience and should be taken with a grain of salt.
